To rebuild the bridge of friendship, I adopted Chapter 2 of the book *Must - Read Guide to Flirting with Men* I bought: 100 Ways to Become the Goddess He Yearns for.
The first tip: Keep three phone calls a day. Don't be as rigid as clocking in at work. Use more question - based sentences. The content can be either humorous or considerate. Avoid being vague. Statements like “Have you eaten?”, “Have you slept?”, and “What are you doing?” are the kind of straightforward girl talk that can make people drowsy and tired of answering.
Me: “...”
Fortunately, I'm not the one chasing after boys.
This would be so憋屈!
I read this book mainly because although Mr. Cheng is gay, he's still a man at heart. I thought the principles of flirting with men should be similar if I want to be friends with him. There's no way I can turn him straight.
So on the days when Mr. Cheng didn't initiate a meeting, I relied on my phone and diligently came up with a new idea every day, like competing with marketing accounts for creativity, making friends in a clock - in - style way.
Monday.
I sent Mr. Cheng a WeChat message: [I had a party with my colleagues last night and ate mushrooms. The doctor said I was poisoned by a strange kind of toxin.]
Mr. Cheng: [What?]
Me: [Good mushroom toxin.]
Mr. Cheng: [... Boring.]
He ignored me.
Tuesday.
I sent Mr. Cheng a WeChat message: [Can you please stop talking!]
Mr. Cheng: [I'm not talking.]
Me: [Then why is your voice ringing in my head? Cute and coquettish.jpg]
Mr. Cheng: [ ... ]
He ignored me again.
I thought this wasn't going to work.
Just relying on text messages was too dull.
It lacked sincerity.
Just when I was worried about what to do, Qi Jiayuan sent me a GIF of a rose special effect. [Good sister, I was wrong. I'm sorry. It was just a joke at first. I didn't expect you to take it seriously. I was afraid that explaining too clearly would hurt your self - esteem, so I never found the right time to explain. Don't be angry...]
Such a familiar sentence pattern.
Wasn't this exactly how I was when I offended Mr. Cheng?
Did he think he could just dismiss me with a fake GIF rose after making me so embarrassed?
I went to the boss's office and said, “Boss, I heard from your uncle that you're very rich.”
Qi Jiayuan looked innocent. “So?”
Me: “You're so rich, but you just send a fake flower as an apology. Where's your sincerity? It's really hard for me to forgive you like this.”
Qi Jiayuan looked around, took a tissue, folded a white flower, and gave it to me. “Will this physical object do?”
Me: “...”
You can keep it and burn it for me on Tomb - Sweeping Day!
I turned around angrily, about to leave, but was stopped by Qi Jiayuan. “Come on, come on, sister. Let me talk to you properly about this.”
Me: “If you call me sister again, I'll quit my job.”
Qi Jiayuan: “Big sister, come and sit down.”
Me: “...”
I sat on the sofa next to the boss and looked at him, trying hard to hold back the urge to punch him.
Yes.
Mr. Cheng must have felt the same way, which was why he didn't want to see me.
Qi Jiayuan said, “Don't think that just because I run a game company, live in a big house in the city center, and drive a Maserati, I'm actually very poor.”
Me: “... Heh.”
Qi Jiayuan: “I've invested all my money in the game *Summoning Ghosts*. Now that the game design is more than half done, the whole team is half - dead, in a rather sluggish state. We urgently need a shot in the arm to revitalize everyone and hand in the most perfect work.”
As soon as I heard this, I felt something was wrong. “What are you up to again? Are you trying to trick me?”
Qi Jiayuan: “It's the leader's appreciation for you. How can it be called tricking? Look at Zhang Yuan. After you scolded him and then gave him a massage as a sweetener, the hanged ghost he redesigned was so amazing! So I hope you...”
Me: “Scold them often?”
Qi Jiayuan nodded. “Uh - huh.”
Me: “And then make everyone in the company hate me and become the enemy of the whole company?”
Qi Jiayuan: “I'll promote you so that your actions will be justifiable. At least even if they hate you... they'll only dare to curse you in their hearts.”
Me: “... I'm quitting. Goodbye. See you later. Don't bother to see me off!”
“Don't be like this, don't be like this,” Qi Jiayuan grabbed me. “Good sister, do me a favor. If this game loses money when it's launched, I'll be really in trouble. Not only will my savings of 26 years go down the drain, but I'll also have to go home and inherit my family's million - dollar fortune... Wuwuwu!”
Me: “... Get out of here!”
Such a classic Versailles person!
-
The next day, I got promoted and became the “overseer” of Shijia Company. Oh no, the professional title was “Senior Testing Supervisor”.
It sounded really awesome.
But our small company didn't have many people. How high - level could a “senior” position be?
It was just a title. My salary didn't increase, but I had more things to do.
After finishing my own work, I had to find the problems and then go to each department to stir things up.
Me: “The game *Summoning Ghosts* is really not very friendly to people like me who are bad at games. In my opinion, it doesn't seem necessary to set up a QTE mechanism in a horror game. The first time, I was scared by the suddenly flying ghost. But since I'm bad at games and died many times and saw this ghost repeatedly, it's kind of... well, a bit annoying.”
Damn it.
I had to be so careful when giving suggestions.
I was afraid of offending my colleagues.
We ate, drank, and lived together.
If they poisoned my food, I would really be “poisoned by good mushrooms”!
Unexpectedly, the colleague whose problem I pointed out responded very modestly and politely: “Yes, I didn't consider this problem comprehensively. What other suggestions do you have?”
I was encouraged and of course had to give the other person a sweetener. This was also knowledge I learned from *Must - Read Guide to Flirting with Men*. Whether it's a boy or a girl, communication is an art. When pointing out what others did wrong, you should also affirm their strengths so that they're more likely to accept your suggestions.
I sincerely praised the colleague: “Of course, although I'm bad at games, *Summoning Ghosts* is the most sincere and creative game I've played in recent years. The atmosphere is well - created, the plot is fascinating, especially the graphics. They're simply exquisite! The incorporation of a large number of Chinese classical elements is very appealing, and the details are carefully crafted with great ingenuity. This is really awesome. I'll definitely buy this game when it's launched.”
Several colleagues gave me thumbs up one after another. “Manager Zhou, you really know your stuff.”
Great.
After the praise, it was time to get to the point. I straightened my face and said, “Also, the thing I hate the most is that saving the game is too troublesome!!! A good horror game has become a kowtow simulator! If this game is launched, this point will definitely be criticized to death!!! Alright, everyone, just modify it.”
The smiles on the colleagues' faces instantly froze—
“Aoooo...”
“My goodness...”
“I said the saving function wasn't good, but you guys didn't believe me!”
“Stop talking. Just modify it...”
“Damn it. We're almost done, and now you say we have to modify it?”
“We're going to be modifying it until we die...”
Wails filled the air.
It was destined to be another all - nighter tonight.
-
While working overtime, an advertisement popped up on my phone.
[Send her fresh flowers every day, with a different surprise every week.]
Huh?
Fresh flowers?
The price was quite cheap.
Thinking of Qi Jiayuan's lack of sincerity, I decided to be a sincere person!
So I clicked to buy and ordered a large bunch of fresh flowers to be sent to Mr. Cheng for a whole week.
The customer service girl asked me: [Sir, are these flowers for your girlfriend?]
Me: [I'm a woman.]
The customer service girl: [Oh. Miss, do you need to sign your name on the card with the flowers? Like “Dear Someone” and so on.]
Dear Mr. Cheng?
That was so uncreative.
I said, [Just sign it for “the super - generous, magnanimous, gentle, considerate, excellent - at - cooking, super - hot, universe - invincible handsome Mr. Cheng”.]
The customer service girl: [ ... Alright, I'll change it to a bigger card for you, as big as an A4 paper. Do you think that's okay?]
Me: [Okay!]