"Carry me."
These words hit Si Kongting like a thunderbolt, shattering the most fragile string in his mind!
Si Kongting had no idea how he picked up Qin Huaiqiu or how he took off his own clothes. By the time he came to his senses, Qin Huaiqiu was already pinned beneath him, both of them completely naked.
"Qiu'er..." Si Kongting's Adam's apple bobbed as he buried his head in Qin Huaiqiu's shoulder. The extreme repression made his voice tremble noticeably.
Whether it was at Fengquan Hot Spring back then or now in Yutian City.
Qin Huaiqiu always seemed to be drifting away from him, heading alone into unknown perils. This feeling of never being able to hold onto him tightly was torturing Si Kongting's heart.
As the emperor of Dacheng, although he could impose restrictions on many levels, just as Dou Yuan had said, Qin Huaiqiu belonged to the borderlands. He couldn't cage a hawk in a prison, even though he loved him deeply and couldn't extricate himself.
Si Kongting's lips trembled. He slowly lowered his head and gently kissed Qin Huaiqiu. Their lips intertwined, and neither of them said a word. It seemed that in this way, their hearts could get closer, and they could forget the worldly troubles.
Sometimes Si Kongting thought that if he wasn't the emperor and Qin Huaiqiu wasn't a general, would they have a better life?
The answer was no.
Si Kongting still vaguely remembered Qin Huaiqiu's valiant back. In front of him, Qin Huaiqiu drew his bow and shot an arrow, shining like the brightest light in the world and instantly illuminating his heart.
It was this very person who made him infatuated and eager to keep by his side for a lifetime.
But he was the emperor, and Qin Huaiqiu was a general.
They both carried missions and responsibilities on their backs. These were things they were forced to bear from birth. They walked forward under the heavy burden, attracted to each other, and entangled in this vast mortal world for half a lifetime.
"There's no danger. Don't cry..." Qin Huaiqiu said with heartache. He slowly propped himself up, held Si Kongting's cheeks in his hands, and gently kissed away his tears.
Cry?
Si Kongting was stunned for a moment. He reached out to wipe his face, and the obvious moisture on his hand made him freeze.
"Don't cry... Don't cry..." Qin Huaiqiu kept kissing him. He understood that Si Kongting sensed the danger. Although he didn't say it explicitly and Si Kongting didn't ask, Si Kongting still felt it.
But Qin Huaiqiu had to do this.
It was already October.
Dacheng was now facing enemies on both fronts. If they couldn't survive this winter, when the grasslands turned green in spring, the pressure from the north would increase rapidly. By then, the Protectorate General's Office must not become a burden to the north of Dacheng. If the war at the Protectorate General's Office hadn't ended after winter, then the future of Dacheng...
So taking a risky move was Qin Huaiqiu's last resort. But he didn't want to tell Si Kongting because he knew Si Kongting would worry.
Si Kongting didn't say a word. He closed his eyes, placed his hands on Qin Huaiqiu's smooth back, and deepened the kiss.
His slippery tongue slipped into Qin Huaiqiu's mouth. Qin Huaiqiu obediently opened his mouth. He urgently needed the comfort of the man in front of him, and so did Si Kongting. So he wrapped his arms around Si Kongting's neck and opened his body without reservation.
Unexpectedly, the next second, Si Kongting suddenly sprang up. He withdrew his hands from Qin Huaiqiu's back, grabbed his shoulders, and pressed him down on the bed again.
Si Kongting stroked all the way down from his shoulders, along his arms and forearms, and finally clasped his wrists.
He suddenly leaned over, got close to Qin Huaiqiu's ear, and said in a trembling voice, "How can I keep you? Qiu'er..."
He didn't want him to endure those wars anymore.
He didn't want him to turn his back on him and head into the darkness again.
For the first time, Si Kongting showed a pleading gesture. Although he knew that no matter how humble this plea was, the man beneath him would ultimately go to the battlefield to fight for his country.
"How can I keep you..." Si Kongting murmured in a low voice. He repeated it and kissed his ear.
Qin Huaiqiu's heart skipped a beat. His nose twitched, and tears welled up in his eyes.
He was the monarch, and Qin Huaiqiu was his subject. Although he also wanted to abandon everything and go with him, his identity didn't allow it, and neither did the people he carried on his shoulders.
"A Ting..." Qin Huaiqiu called out with tears in his eyes.
Si Kongting shuddered. The next second, he reached out and pulled open his hair bun. He took out the ribbon and directly tied Qin Huaiqiu's hands to the head of the bed.
"A Ting... A Ting..." Qin Huaiqiu called out forgetfully with tears in his eyes. He raised his head to ask for a kiss, but Si Kongting suddenly held the back of his head and kissed him deeply.
In an instant, they kissed each other like wild beasts. They seemed to have forgotten everything and deliberately cast aside each other's identities and constraints at this moment. They just wanted to comfort each other, trying to wash away the confusion and suffering in their hearts with this most primitive impulse.
Si Kongting's fingertips began to linger on the white lotus. Qin Huaiqiu tilted his head and sighed like a man playing in the water.
Two lotuses blooming side by side, mandarin ducks necking.
The long night wore on. Outside the window, the wind and snow still howled. Inside the warm room, no one knew whose sweat first dampened the sheets, leaving a charming fragrance in this long night.
-
The next day, the wind and snow really stopped.
Qin Huaiqiu opened his eyes at dawn.
He looked at Si Kongting lying beside him, sleeping with his arms around him. The affection and love in his eyes were undisguised. He gently kissed Si Kongting's lips and then didn't dare to look at him anymore. He got out of bed quietly.
He carefully put on his clothes. When he was about to go out, there was a rustling sound behind him.
Si Kongting slowly sat up. He didn't say a word, just stared intently at Qin Huaiqiu's back, his eyes full of complex emotions.
Qin Huaiqiu's movements stiffened for a moment. He didn't turn around or look at Si Kongting.
The air seemed to freeze for a moment.
After an unknown amount of time, Qin Huaiqiu's lips trembled slightly, and he said softly, "Remember what I said. You are my hope."
The person behind him was silent and didn't say a word, but his scorching gaze made Qin Huaiqiu feel as if he had a芒 on his back.
Qin Huaiqiu gave a sad smile. Still with his back to him, he pushed the door open with both hands and walked out.
"I'm leaving."
Wan Chengyan had been standing in the snow for a long time. He heard the sound and turned to look at Qin Huaiqiu walking slowly towards him.
Qin Huaiqiu stopped beside him and asked, "How long have you been waiting?"
Wan Chengyan shook his head and said, "Not long." His eyes flashed, and he suddenly saw the obvious red mark on Qin Huaiqiu's neck. He quietly lowered his eyes.
"Then let's set off now." Qin Huaiqiu said.
Wan Chengyan looked up at Qin Huaiqiu, clasped his fists, and said, "Yes, Young General."
"Shh..." Qin Huaiqiu looked at him, suddenly put his index finger on his lips, pulled up his collar a little, and winked.
Wan Chengyan was stunned for a moment, and then his face turned red.