"How about we go on Saturday?" In the evening, after the trip to Taiwan, Lu Zhihang finally climbed into Lin Wan's bed and got to hold the woman he loved so much as he fell asleep. Wrapping his arm around her waist, he asked with a gentle smile.
"..." Lin Wan didn't say a word. She bit her lips tightly. She was a bit regretful about the impulsive words she had said before.
"Wanwan?" Not getting a reply from his beloved, Lu Zhihang was a bit confused. He propped himself up slightly and looked at Lin Wan, who had her back turned to him.
In a hurry, Lin Wan reached out and pushed Lu Zhihang's head back down. Sighing helplessly, she said, "I'm a bit scared..."
"... Scared of what?" Lu Zhihang was a bit puzzled. He reached out and grabbed Lin Wan's hand under the quilt, gently rubbing it as he asked in a soft voice that gently rippled in the night.
"Not scared of anything in particular. I'm just scared." Lin Wan couldn't really put her finger on it, so she could only reply vaguely.
Lu Zhihang fell silent. He continued to hold Lin Wan but didn't say a word. Just listening to his breathing, Lin Wan knew that he wasn't asleep.
After a while, Lin Wan, who had thought her beloved would ask her something, finally couldn't hold it in anymore. She turned back to look at Lu Zhihang and happened to meet his intense gaze. For a moment, she was a bit speechless. "..., Why don't you ask me?"
"Would you tell me if I asked?"
Lu Zhihang suddenly said after two seconds of silence. Lin Wan was stunned for a moment upon hearing this.
She also asked herself the same question in her heart. If Lu Zhihang really asked her the reason, would she tell him? For a moment, the answers of "yes" and "no" wavered in her mind. She didn't want to tell Lu Zhihang because she didn't want him to feel heartache over her disgraceful childhood. But subconsciously, she also wanted to share those upsetting things with him. She hoped to get understanding rather than sympathy.
"Why wouldn't I?" Sometimes words come out faster than thoughts. During the time Lin Wan was thinking, her mouth had already answered Lu Zhihang's question for her. By the time she came to her senses, it was too late to back out.
But Lu Zhihang seemed to understand very well. He stroked her hair and said, "Go to sleep. We have to get up early tomorrow. Don't you have to go back to school?"
Lin Wan opened her mouth, but then Lu Zhihang gently pushed her face back around.
Feeling the warmth of the hands around her waist, Lin Wan suddenly felt tears welling up in her eyes. She suddenly thought that a person as gentle as Lu Zhihang must know what she needed. He wasn't just trying to comfort her; he was doing it out of love.
Suddenly, she turned her head and her body along with it. She faced Lu Zhihang and looked into his eyes.
Lu Zhihang was a bit surprised. His eyes widened slightly, and he didn't say a word right away. Lin Wan had already reached out of the covers and cupped his face. "Ask me. I'll tell you! Everything!"
Perhaps her expression was too determined. Lu Zhihang was actually caught off guard for a moment. He just let Lin Wan cup his face, looking a bit dazed.
"Ask." Maybe it was too quiet in the room with no one speaking. Lin Wan suddenly got nervous again and quickly said another word.
Only then did Lu Zhihang come to his senses. A hint of a smile suddenly appeared in his eyes. He said softly, "Why?"
"..." Lin Wan looked at him and opened her mouth. For a moment, she didn't know where to start. Perhaps the bad memories of her childhood were too old for her. She didn't know when things had started to change.
"What's wrong?" Seeing Lin Wan's confused expression, Lu Zhihang was a bit helpless for a moment. He let out a soft sigh and asked.
"Ah? Oh, let me think about where to start. I can't really remember those memories clearly." A look of confusion flashed across Lin Wan's face for a second, and then she said.
Only then did Lu Zhihang realize that the panic Lin Wan had shown before was really deeply ingrained in her heart since childhood and had never faded away.
Lin Wan's childhood was a painful one. That was the only impression she had of it.
In her childhood, the shadows of two people were always blurry. One was her father, and the other was her mother. These two people, who were supposed to bring her all the happiness in childhood, didn't stay in her childhood for very long.
"I don't remember how old I was when my mom left. I think I was in the third or fourth grade of primary school. I can't even remember what she looked like," Lin Wan hesitated for a moment and said softly. "She sent me to my uncle's house and then ran away with the money from my uncle's company. I've never seen her again."
Lu Zhihang didn't expect things to be like this. Watching Lin Wan struggling to recall in confusion was really heart - wrenching. He gently patted her back and didn't interrupt.
"My dad died early. I don't have any impression of him. Whenever I think of him, all I can see in my memory is my uncle's face. They said my uncle and my dad looked very similar, but I just felt like he was a stranger. I couldn't find any trace of my dad in him at all," Lin Wan said.
"After my mom left, it was always my uncle who took care of me, paid for my school, and provided for my food and drinks. My aunt didn't like me. She never gave me a good look. I actually don't blame her at all. After all, it was our family's fault. It was my mom who almost made my uncle's company go bankrupt. It was our family who ruined theirs."
"My uncle was very good to me. In my first year of high school, my relationship with my aunt completely broke down. In the end, my uncle had no choice but to buy me a house outside and let me move out... This is the house. From that day on, I learned to be self - reliant. I basically never asked my uncle for money again, but my uncle still always gave me money."
"Even the part - time job last time was arranged by him... He was really good to me. He's the best person to me in the world. But the better he was to me, the more guilty I felt. Even if he hated me, I wouldn't hate my mom so much. If it weren't for her, no one would have been hurt!"
Lin Wan's words had always been very calm, as if she were telling someone else's story. But when she said the last sentence, she clearly showed a relatively strong emotional fluctuation.
Lu Zhihang felt both heartache and helplessness. He looked at Lin Wan's expression for a long time. Finally, he gently kissed the corner of her eye where tears were about to fall and said, "There's no need. From now on, I'm your family. My family is your family. My mom is your mom. You don't have to think about that person anymore. I'll always be with you from now on."
Lin Wan smiled. She looked at Lu Zhihang seriously and suddenly said, "I knew you weren't like others who just felt sorry for me."
"Really?" Lu Zhihang also smiled. "Actually, I do feel quite sorry for you. After all, you've been through so much."
Hearing this, Lin Wan nodded very seriously and said, "Come to think of it, it really has been quite rough. You can feel sorry for me. Anyway, I don't mind if you do."
"Really?" Lu Zhihang raised his eyebrows.
"Yeah." Lin Wan nodded and blinked her eyes.
Looking at her cute and playful look, Lu Zhihang felt as if something was tickling his heart...